70000 TONS OF METAL 2019 HIGHLIGHT : ALL HAIL THE FUN TUB
There’s something about 70,000 Tons of Metal that is inherently exhausting. Between running around to catch one of the 120 shows on board, attending meet and greets and clinics, finding time to feed yourself, and sleeping, the chances to just sit back and relax are few and far between. Enter the most genius invention on the cruise liner: the side stage hot tubs.
Until 2018 when I took the plunge during Sabaton’s pool deck set, I hadn’t experienced the pure bliss of being up to my armpits in near-boiling water while a band I can at least tolerate plays for the crowd before and around them. But once I made the executive decision to leave my camera at home and make 70,000 Tons of Metal a strictly no work vacation, my life changed. Nobody would ever really equate heavy metal with relaxation, but that is what the side stage hot tub provides, if you choose wisely.
Upon climbing the stairs leading to the inviting glorified baths, one is presented with two paths; the path to relaxing righteousness (typically on the right), and the path that rocks! For every show played on the pool deck stage, there is a hot tub that just wants to have a nice, chill time, and a hot tub that wants to be loud, splash around, screech like peregrine falcons, crowd surf, and have a good old fashioned, slippery circle pit.
This year, I elected to get swampy and watch Kalmah as well as my all-time favourite band, Ensiferum, from the fun tub, and I can honestly say it was the most fun I’ve ever had on that cruise. Between the two Finnish bands’ sets, my rowdy tubmates were singing Tenacious D delightfully off-key while slamming Foster’s cans the size of my thighs as quickly as possible. During the sets, they were making sure no soul escaped without being drenched from head to toes.
Headbanging along to the best songs from both bands, shoving each other, and singing along as loudly as our tired vocal cords would allow us to, those 3 hours spent taking a bath with a small group under the judgmental eyes in the hot tub next to ours were some of the best in all of my 70,000 Tons of Metal years.
As Ensiferum was the last full show I saw on board this year, the perfect setting put a very sweaty cherry on top of an already-incredible sundae.
All hail the fun tub!